The official blog of Susan Landis-Steward, writer of whatever she likes, and co-founder of Puddletown Publishing Group

About Me

  1. I have a new dog, Gwyneth. Actually, she’s not so new anymore. We’ve had her for two years.
  2. Three people call me Mom.
  3. Three call me Grandma Soozie.
  4. I hope more will call me that someday. (A new granddaughter is due in April 2011)
  5. I live in Beavercreek, OR.
  6. Right on the creek.
  7. I am a lesbian.
  8. Jenny and I have been together for eighteen years when I do math the right way. (Okay, now it’s getting closer to 20)
  9. When I make math mistakes, it’s been seventeen years. (or 19)
  10. I am not good at math.
  11. Sophie is an evil cat who hates me. (Sophie is also dead so our relationship has improved.
  12. She has Jenny conned but Jenny doesn’t care. (Especially now that the cat is dead)
  13. Theologically, I am a JuBuEpiscoPagaTarian Universalist.
  14. With some Muslim thrown in for good measure.
  15. Obviously, the only church that would have me, at least without a muzzle, is the Unitarian Universalist.
  16. I write indexes for a living.
  17. Indexes are those things in the back of books with page numbers so you can look things up.
  18. I also write mysteries.
  19. Funny, lesbian mysteries. Even my straight friends laugh!
  20. My oldest daughter is married to an Army officer.
  21. He flies small jets. (Now he flies luxury planes to exotic places ferrying Generals and other VIPs around)
  22. He is a pilot and a hero, complete with commendations.
  23. She is a substitute teacher and entrepreneur. (Not any more. She’s now a banker, a writer, and an entrepreneur)
  24. They raise children and horses.
  25. He is in Iraq for his third tour. (Actually, he’s home now. But he may go back so he can get some training he wants.) (Now he’s scheduled to go to Afghanistan eight days after his third child is born.)
  26. I hate this war.
  27. I once saw a UFO.
  28. I had a dream I was an alien princess when I was a kid and my people came to visit me.
  29. During a past-life regression, I saw myself as a blue furry creature.
  30. I do believe in aliens and sometimes like to think I am one.
  31. Unfortunately, I was born here.
  32. My middle daughter has a degree in Physics.
  33. She may be an alien.
  34. She sure isn’t related to me. See number 10.
  35. Her husband is from Peru.
  36. Which explains why she took all that Spanish in college.
  37. He is a tile contractor and did our floors when we built this house.
  38. She is the assistant manager of a bank. She just gave us our third grandchild, the amazing Emma Sofia.
  39. My youngest just graduated from high school. (Well, a few years ago. She is now in college AND the circus)
  40. She is currently at drama camp. (Nope. She is currently leading circus camp)
  41. She is an amazing actress.
  42. Sometimes she wants to join the circus and be an aerialist and funambulist. (Turns out she’s an aerialist and a contortionist.)
  43. Funambulist means tightrope walker.
  44. I think having a child in the circus is so much cooler than having a child who is a doctor or attorney.
  45. I drive a Prius when I can wrest it away from Jenny.
  46. She works forty miles away so I seldom drive the Prius.
  47. I can drive a Toyota van if I have to but I don’t like to.
  48. Since my commute is all of 20 feet, I drive a Kymco Sting 50 most of the time when I have to run errands.
  49. That’s a scooter.
  50. I am middle aged but I love adventure.
  51. The scooter has a top speed of 45 mph, downhill.
  52. I also have a Trek bike but my daughter messed it up.
  53. I can’t figure out how to work the new bike rack.
  54. Otherwise I’d get the bike fixed.
  55. It costs $100 to fill the van.
  56. It costs $4 to fill the scooter.
  57. It costs $45 to fill the Prius.
  58. The van gets 22 mpg.
  59. The Prius gets 43 mpg (it’s a 2002). (New Prius is a 2005, gets over 50 mpg)
  60. The scooter gets 80 mpg
  61. You do the math. See number 10.
  62. The bicycle is free but it’s broken.
  63. I have a degree in Computer Science.
  64. I was the first woman to get one at my university.
  65. That was in 1973.
  66. I have a degree in Education.
  67. I have a minor in Architecture.
  68. I have a Masters in Spiritual Traditions and Ethics
  69. I have most of a Masters in Publishing/Technical Writing
  70. I have been published. Many times.
  71. I used to be a journalist.
  72. I have half a Masters in Vocational Education
  73. I have a certificate in Anglican Theology equivalent to two years of seminary.
  74. I love education.
  75. Can you tell?
  76. I have two siblings.
  77. Jenny has two siblings and six step-siblings.
  78. Christmas is a riot.
  79. I am a spinner, knitter, weaver, dyer, and general fiber addict. I have recently taken up quilting.
  80. We have a small business called Two Old Batts.
  81. Batt is a fiber preparation.
  82. There are deer in our yard.
  83. There are beavers in our creek.
  84. There are rabbits everywhere. Our cats kill them. Our dog hides the evidence.
  85. Jenny is a bureaucrat with the child welfare program for the state.
  86. I love her anyway.
  87. I have been to Turkey, Greece, Germany, Peru, Canada, and Mexico.
  88. I have been to Washington, California, Nevada, Utah, Idaho, Montana, New Mexico, Arizona, and Hawaii.
  89. I have been to New York, New Jersey, South Carolina, Georgia, Florida, Alabama, and Pennsylvania.
  90. I’ve flown over most of the middle states.
  91. I have been to Texas, Kansas, Missouri, Illinois.
  92. They are in the middle.
  93. Jenny and I were married in the Episcopal church.
  94. We were also married by the state but they took it back.
  95. We got married at a house church ceremony.
  96. We filed domestic partnership in Multnomah County.
  97. I’m really tired of getting married but we’ll probably do it again sometime just to make it legal.
  98. I am brain damaged.
  99. No, it did not involve the scooter.
  100. I died on the operating table.
  101. I did not go to the light or see Jesus.
  102. Obviously, they brought me back.
  103. What I saw was a middle-aged Asian nurse, about 4′ tall, leaning over me and yelling “Breathe”.
  104. Scared me so much I kept on breathing.
  105. Mostly I’m okay although I sometimes have balance issues and aphasia.
  106. I don’t ride or drive when that happens.
  107. I did get fibromyalgia as a parting gift.
  108. I love folk music.
  109. I love classical music as long as it’s Baroque.
  110. I used to play the violin.
  111. Jenny still plays the violin and the guitar.
  112. I might take up guitar again.
  113. I quit taking piano lessons because there were rats in the basement.
  114. Our apartment burned down about 13 years ago.
  115. Our friends where wonderful
  116. Our cat and goldfish lived through it.
  117. The goldfish was renamed Poached.
  118. Poached lived for years until we decided he needed a friend.
  119. He died of a social disease.
  120. My dream team is any combination of Gore, Edwards, and Kucinich.
  121. I’ll settle for Obama.
  122. More later when I feel like it.

Comments on: "About Me" (3)

  1. I love your site. Keep it up !

  2. soooo funny 🙂 love it!!!!

  3. I loved this post! Turns out we have a few things in common ie. our frustration with math, more than a few miscellaneous pets and abundant wild life, I quit French horn lessons because it wasn’t cool, etc., etc. Looking forward to your continuing posts

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